Archive for April, 2012
My oh my, lots of varying advice on this topic. Here’s an example of when our female client, Linda DID text her date, Rob afterward and here’s what happened…
We had received a very positive post date evaluation from Rob about Linda — he found her to be really warm and engaging, friendly, attractive, bright and impressive — he also mentioned that he didn’t sense that “electricity” that he’s hoping to find in his romantic partner. When I asked him if he was open to having a second date…he hesitated and said, “I’m thinking about it, I’m not sure yet.”
Linda really enjoyed her first date with Rob. Things went well, they talked for two hours over wine, shared an appetizer and lots of laughter together. She couldn’t quite tell if “the romance vibe” was there for her or for him either, and she wasn’t sure just what to do. Her mama had impressed upon her the importance of always saying Thank You, so she took a chance and sent him a sweet, positive text message the next day saying “Rob, thanks so much for last night — loved the stories and the laughter. Call or text anytime. Best. Linda”
And here’s what happened. Rob had checked in with us to let us know that he had a great time and that he was kinda on the fence about a second date. I learned from him a week later that they DID in fact have a second date and a third one was in the works. Matchmakers LOVE to see second and third dates, so naturally I was excited.
I asked Rob what pushed him to the courtship side of the fence and he said, “She’s just so sweet, nice, easy going, warm — she had texted me the day after our first date to say Thanks and we just started a fun text message dialogue which lead to some flirtation and another date…and now another. There’s something special about her — she’s really fun, relaxed, playful. I’m enjoying getting to know her and I’m glad I didn’t miss the chance to see her again.”
In the ongoing debate — should she call or text him after the first date — in this case it was a good idea.
Share your examples with us too. When did reaching out to a guy work out for you? When didn’t it? Guys? What do you think?
There’s never been a better time to be single and dating. Truly. Why? Because as professional matchmakers, we have tools, resources, and networking capabilities like never before to enable us to find needles in haystacks for even the most challenging-to-match clients, especially those who are searching in a specific niche.
How do we find the candidates for our VIP clients to meet? Well…right here, for instance, as good news travels fast – good news like the Free Registration option for both men and women at http://www.CupidsCoach.com. Here’s how it works. We ask the question, “Who do you know?” and the word gets out. For example…
We have a stellar new gentleman client who’s looking for one special woman – she needs to be Russian and Jewish and ready for marriage and family. Know someone who qualifies? I thought you might! Send her here to register privately with me, for free, no matter where she lives on the planet: http://www.CupidsCoach.com so we can find her when we’re searching for him. He’s thoroughly scrumptious…
We have two new female clients who are interested in meeting, dating and partnering with a Muslim gentleman. Do you know a really great single Muslim man? I thought so. You’ll pass this along to him, we’ll reach out to him with an invitation, we’ll screen and qualify him, and then we can create the introduction.
One of my all-time favorite clients lives in Shanghai and Florida – my guess is that somewhere in your little black book is a stellar single gentleman who has “the hots” for Asian women. Yes? I thought so. You’ll pass this on to him, he’ll register with us, we’ll do the legwork, and then we’ll make the introduction.
We have clients who are interested in meeting African American men, for some we are targeting Latin women, and for another we’re searching for single Jewish Women. We have single Christian women looking for single Christian men. We have Single Dads looking for Single Moms. We have tall women looking for tall men, we have men who like super skinny women and we have men who love chubby women. Thank goodness there’s a lid for every pot, right?
We want to send out a Thank You to all of you who have helped us build this award winning matchmaking community at http://www.CupidsCoach.com . With over 21,000 in our date-a-base we are celebrating the rich diversity that you all have helped us create. Thanks for sharing your friends, colleagues, and family members with us, so we can help them get connected.
To attract the most fitting, viable candidates for the possibility of relationship, your dating profile should reveal only what’s TRUE. No fibbing…
Which means you should reveal who you are professionally, making clear the nature of the work you do every day. However, keep in mind that with a dating profile, you’re not interviewing for a professional position, rather…a personal one…
Especially if you’re a successful, accomplished woman who wants to be with a man who is in a strong position financially and professionally — it’s really important to take into consideration that he doesn’t “need” his female partner to be a competitive powerhouse type — in fact many of these Alpha Men will make a point to avoid dating Alpha Females completely, as they really just want to find someone who’s complimentary, who fits nicely into his life. He’s looking for a soft place to land at the end of a hard day.
So, yes, if you’re a CEO or an attorney, or a physician say so in your profile, but keep in mind that he might be more enthused about meeting you if you let him know how much you love tennis or skiing, or playing with your niece, or hosting the Fourth of July Barbeque for family — a masculine man is typically attracted to and craves being with a feminine woman, who can provide for him things he can’t or just doesn’t provide for himself.
In writing your online dating profile, highlight the elements of your personality and character that will be complimentary to the type of man you’re looking to attract.
In other words, don’t out-man-your-man in the way you describe yourself in your dating profile, or that man might just…run the other way…
Your Matchmaker’s Advice? Love and Romance – it’s an attitude, a frame of mind we want to nurture, feed, stroke, and energize.
Every day. In bits and pieces.
The mission for the busy, professional single mom is to keep your love life alive, developing, growing — every day.
What, you ask? Without a man to love on? Without a man to love on me? Doesn’t love and romance require two people, simultaneously engaged in the process of loving each other? Yes, sometimes. We love it when love and romance happen just that way.
And also….let’s remember that love and romance happen through the human experience. Moment by moment, when we choose to have a loving moment or a romantic moment. These moments can happen anytime, anyplace, and even all by ourselves.
In fact, love and romance starts right there. Within. Moment by moment as part of our human experience.
Exercise your love and romance muscles, with our without a partner.
Allow for yourself, insist on providing for yourself those delicious sensual moments that spark and kindle the feminine spirit.
A quick 30-second intermission (in the middle of an email you’re writing) to tune into the sweet sounds of the birds outside. A 30-second intermission to notice and savor those tender, soft, bright green baby buds on the trees outside the window. No window nearby? Bring a tiny vase with a gorgeous blooming flower (or TWO flowers…symbolozing the relationship that’s in your future…)
Men are naturally, instinctively drawn to women who are in touch with their sensuous femininity. Here’s the trick — While you’re being a good mom, while you’re being a devoted professional on the job, throughout your day sprinkle in these 30-second ahhhhh moments, which will bring you an instant lightness of spirit, that twinkle in the eye, the inner glow that radiates from deep within and that automatically generates a natural smile to your face — the warm glow, that soft, sweet, knowing smile that men find so tantalizing, so captivating and so alluring.
In other words, taking 30 seconds to smell the roses brings you instant joy, enables your romantic spirit, and serves as that magnetic pull drawing men (suitors) into your realm.